Irena

If I were to die today, I imagine my obituary would read something like "She loved puppies and 30 Rock and occasionally pretended to be productive at service projects that were organized by people that were better than her." Yeah. Something like that. When I read the following words about Irena Sendler, I couldn't help but get a little weepy and inspired. Read it right now and then better yourself.

Irena Sendler, 1910-2008

A 98 year-old Polish woman named Irena Sendler recently died. During WWII, Irena worked in the Warsaw Ghetto as a plumbing/sewer specialist. Irena smuggled Jewish children out; infants in the bottom of the tool box she carried and older children in a burlap sack she carried in the back of her truck. She also had a dog in the back that she trained to bark when the Nazi soldiers let her in and out of the ghetto. The soldiers wanted nothing to do with the dog, and the barking covered the kids’ and infants’ noises. Irena managed to smuggle out and save 2500 children. She eventually was caught, and the Nazis broke both her legs, arms and beat her severely. Irena kept a record of the names of all the kids she smuggled out and kept them in a glass jar buried under a tree in her backyard. After the war, she tried to locate any parents that may have survived and reunited some of the families. Most had been killed. She helped those children get placement into foster family homes or adopted. Last year Irena was up for the Nobel Peace Prize. She was not selected. Al Gore won - for a slide show on Global Warming.

My thoughts exactly, Al.

Jamie Sullivan? Is that you?

I had to post this because I want to remember this look for the rest of my life. I don't really care for Mandy Moore, but she knocked it out of the park on Oscar night and now I'm going to keep my eyes peeled for her fashion choices in the future.

Isn't this so Betty Draper of her? I had to do a double-take because she doesn't look like Mandy Moore but a brunette Grace Kelly. Everything is perfect: polished hair, peaches and cream makeup, and a kick-a dress. Le sigh. I want to dress up.

By the way. Can we all campaign for Shane West to start acting again in real movies so he can make it to the Oscar's next year? I know you all want this to happen.

If you need some cheerin' up

I like how he looks

That is all.

Lay off me, I'm starving

A couple months ago I started what I hope to be a long term diet, otherwise known as a “life change” according to scary monster Jillian Michaels. I have been doing a lot of research about how to make this successful, and everything I read tells me that I need to admit that I’m trying to get fit publicly and probably write about it every once in a while or whatever. It’s been a rocky start, but I’ve lost ten pounds. And this is how I feel, constantly:

Will somebody please give me cookies? I won’t tell anyone.



I will also accept cupcakes.

Whip it real good

I wish he was still the Fresh Prince.

Well, I never!

As of late, the title of this post is a little phrase that I find myself declaring quite often, with a southern belle accent of course. It can be quite appropriate in a number of situations, including, but not limited to:

When someone does something impressive
When someone says something perverted
When someone does something shocking
When I am accused of singing in the shower
When I am cut off on the freeway
When I cut someone off on the freeway
When someone accuses me of singing in the shower
When I am staring at/eating delcious food stuffs
When I see an attractive man
When a baby coos or does something equally as sweet
Anything involving puppies

And the list goes on and on. Yes, I utter these three simple words more often than Paula Dean says "needs more butter," but one day I sat down and thought really hard about the meaning of them. Let’s break it down.

But first, I tried to google a funny picture of Paula with butter, but found these elegant nails instead. Hilarious!




Back to breaking it down:

“Well” can be a filler word that is often used for hesitancy, no? We use it to spare a little time to think of what we are going to say next. That leads us to….

“I” refers to me, and me only. No one else. Me. Not you.

“Never” means not at all, not even kinda, sorta, just a little bit. Absolutely not.

The obvious meanings of these words got ME thinking about all of the things that I have never done and how I am too ashamed to admit what those things are. I am not talking about extreme things like skydiving, helping save the children in Africa, or making my armpit fart, either. I am talking about common things that I probably should have done or should currently be doing.

In fact, whenever I get in the horrible situation at a training/party/get to know you activity in which we play the dreadful game “Never Have I Ever,” I can usually exit unnoticed by backing slowly out the room mumbling “I need to powder my nose” or “excuse me while I take this call” since I know that I will WIN the game, because YES, I have NEVER done a ton of crap.

And now you want to know what these things are. And now I will tell you.

I have never:

+Read Harry Potter
+Hiked the Y
+Balanced my check book
+Ran a consecutive mile
+Dyed my hair
+Called to order a pizza
+Personally washed my car
+Used Neosporin
+Eaten sushi
+Seen: Psych, House, the CSIs, 24, Lost, or any other tv show that probably has actual merit
+Seen: Star Wars, LoTR, The Sound of Music, The Bourne Identity movies, or any other movie that probably has actual merit
+Bought a song off of iTunes
+Flossed (Just kidding. I’ve done it dozens of times.)
+Blessed my breakfast

What common things have YOU never done?